Eyy3s
- A lot of people don't use their initiative because no-one told them to.
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I’ve lost it all in every soul and it will take so long to rebuild. How i have seen people change so rapidly, and how they contradict who they used to be. They want to hurt me and form a differenti personality. Different from the one i grew so close to. When they knew everything about me and they used it against me to make me hurt, cry and feel do small. All they care about is their own feelings and what makes then happy. When they make me experience so much negitivity, i wonder if everyone is the same? If theyre all so twisted and weird inside? If they all ruin me? If I can ever meet someone who will make me want to trust again? I think If they will change everything for the better and make it right how it should be. If there is someone out there who isn’t in the norm, in a good way, but inexplicably brilliant, Amazing and perfect. If thats too hopeful. If it will ever happen. If it will all change. If i get who i actually want. Or If it will a fall apart. If this will happen Soon because ive waited for so long. Or if ill have to ponder when this will occur, and wait, wait, it out. But i do keep my head down, get on and live. Despite what goes on in my head, i act okay. Everything is fine. Its fine. But really it takes over every fibre of my being and I constantly think, what is going to happen?
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At 12 at night when i have to get up at 7 to go to college. Why do i have an urge to actually do my work now and not at a normal time in the day?!
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Got accepted for a new college today. Good day at work and learnt the differencr between fruit and vegetables. This was the main topic in the staff room today and they seemed to ne getting quite into it…. I thought the differencevwas veg grew in the gound and fruit grew on trees, but fruit has seeds and veg doesn’t. Also cucumber is a vegetable? I’m not a dumb or illiterate person bit i felt a bit stupid there!!!!
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I can’t believe how much this weekend has changed my life. I have the weirdest feeling inside and feel so inexplicable. Wow. I wonder what I will feel like tomorrow though. I’m a little scared to go to sleep.
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I knew I couldn’t trust anyone but, it’s amazing what some people go and do. I should have seen that coming.
